so_out_of_ideas | (no subject)

teddibear requested this fic months ago. I didn't forget, but I've been waiting for the right impetus. I found it in this cap, a shot of an actual page from Daniel's journal, which Sam read aloud in Fire and Water.

Rediscovered Hearts (The SG-1 series on the Daniel/Vala Archive):
Parts 1-21
Parts 22-47

Title: Distraction
Author: Lionchilde
Summary: AU ...Jack says we'll find her...

Rating: PG
Length: Around 800 words
Category: Angst
Pairings/Charaters: Daniel/Vala and Sam/Jack implied; Daniel/Jack friendship
A/N: This is an addendum to Rediscovered Hearts set between Jack's Court Martial hearing and Vala's rescue. Links to the series can be found above. Written for

scifi_five.

Distraction

Sha're is gone. Jack says we'll find her. If anyone can, he can.

The words jumped out at him and he felt his breath catch. They were scrawled across the journal page in his own handwriting, but he hadn't known that he'd written them. He'd been discussing board games, things he'd uncovered on Abydos. Right in the middle of that discussion came the simple statements that echoed his despair--his hope. Then, at the end of the third sentence, he'd gone back to what he'd been saying before, never even realizing where his thoughts had wandered.

Daniel sighed and closed the book, wondering again why he'd asked Nick to bring his old journals from the house. He'd wanted a distraction, he supposed--anything to keep his mind occupied and away from the new fear that had settled over him. Sha're was gone, but she had been for a long time. Now Vala was gone, too--trapped with Brannen Daegar so that the team could get Daniel back through the 'Gate before he bled to death.

Jack says we'll find her. If anyone can, he can.

He had to ask himself whether his opinion of Jack had changed, but he knew that it hadn't. Jack had been the one responsible for Vala's capture. Daniel was sure that she had left him no choice as far as the rescue mission was concerned, but Jack had given the order to leave her behind. That knowledge sat hollowly in his chest, making his throat tighten again. Jack must have felt that he'd had no other option. The trade had been Vala's idea, and the whole team had made it clear that they intended to come back for her. Daniel would have died if they'd been forced to stay much longer. Jack did what he always did--he made the call that no one else wanted to make. Still, Daniel's jaw tightened with the thought that Jack had also known that Vala was pregnant--and Jack knew better than anyone that Daniel would rather die than risk his wife and unborn child.

…gone…Jack says we'll find her…

Get out, Jack, his own angry order came back to him. He hadn't known when he said it that the rescue mission would cost Jack his career. He should have, though. Maybe he would have if he hadn't still been weak and confused. Jack didn't yell back; he just quietly dropped the note that Vala had entrusted to him, nodded, and walked out.

Now, the court martial ruling weighed heavily on Daniel as well. Forced retirement seemed like a slap in the face to a man like Jack O'Neill. Despite Daniel's best efforts, though, it had been the only option other than a dishonorable discharge. He hadn't expected Jack to take it as well as he had--but, he thought wryly, maybe Jack had been waiting for the right excuse to come along. The Goa'uld were no longer a major threat. The Ori, strangely, had never made another attempt to invade the galaxy after Vala stopped them at the Beachhead. If there was a right time for retirement, this was it--and as much as she loved him, Daniel knew that Sam wouldn't wait around for Jack forever. She'd already almost married Pete.

He sighed a little at that memory, and his thoughts turned to the fact that Jack probably still had no idea that the team had returned from P7X-377. His eyes flicked toward the phone on the bedside table, and after a moment's hesitation, he reached for the controls that would adjust the infirmary bed. Once he was sitting up, he stared at the phone for another few minutes, then finally picked it up and dialed.

"'Lo?" Jack answered on the second ring.

"Hi, Jack," he said.

"Daniel," came the casual reply.

"The, um, team's back," Daniel offered.

"Oh yeah?" Jack responded. "How's Carter? She get the stuff from the giants fixed yet?"

"Sam's fine," Daniel smiled, wondering how long it was really going to take the pair to stop using each other's last names in casual conversation. "She's working on adapting the Heand technology now. She could probably use a dinner break."

"Y'think?" Jack asked.

"You know how distracted she gets when she's working," Daniel nodded, ignoring the faint snort of amusement from his friend. Before Jack could make a "look who's talking" crack, he went on, "Jack, I wanted to apologize again."

"You don't have to, Daniel," came the quick reply.

"Yes, I do. If--if I had been in Vala's position, I would have done the same thing. And I would have expected you to give the same order. I can't fault you for it now," Daniel said.

"Yeah, well," Jack cleared his throat uncomfortably. "I dunno if that's an order I would have given."

"That's okay too," Daniel said softly. "I know."

"Right," Jack coughed, hurriedly shifting the subject. "We're gonna get her back, Daniel."

"I know," Daniel nodded. "If anyone can, you can."